As Pam blazed her way up the scientific ziggurat inside Lockheed MartinsSilicone Valley and Palmdale design labs making her name, and ourfortune, I occupied my time teaching part-time at a British School forex-pats kids, and doing voluntary work. I was not exactly a househusband for a decade but I was not far off it.Then one day after reaching the pinnacle of success in her field shejust came home one evening and told me. "Mitch, it's time we went home.If I carry on like this I'll lose myself and turn into one of the sadcorporate suits who used to be a good scientist." To do what Pam?" Take a long holiday, and have a year off," she said, "Maybe do someteaching I don't know, but I do know I want to go home!"Six months later we saw the house in Budleigh Hill and it lookedperfect. After the frenetic pace of life in California the idea ofliving in the quiet tranquillity of a chocolate box cover Englishvillage was like stepping into a different world and I think we both letout a deep sigh. The way I bashed on you… Well, the way I bashed on Kevin. I just know now that I never made it so you felt comfortable enough to tell me the truth.”I take her hands in mine. “I also realize now that Kevin was never the real you. Nicole was always you. Kevin was just a mask you were forced to wear.” Her eyes began to water, but before the tears have a chance to fall she wraps around as she buries her head in my chest. I pull her close to me as I run a hand through her hair. I don’t know how to explain it… But having her in my arms once again just feels right. It’s as if the rest of the world and all it’s problems just melted away. I just want to hold onto this feeling that takes over me when I’m with her. I feel almost complete. Like I’ve finally found that part of my soul I’ve been missing this whole time. As we finally pull apart, I look into her eyes to see if she felt it too. Her expression matches the way I feel and now I know it was just me. “Please tell me you felt that too?”.
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